ANE Stories
[STORY] OGA LANDLORD (Episode 58)
Episode 58.
The two bodyguards with me pulled their guns and pointed at the angry gorilla staring daggers at me.
Bodyguard1: put him down now!!
Bodyguard2: we be state security, we go shoot you. No question *pull out an i.d and show him*
I come look down discover say my feet don travel up commot from the surface, lwkmd. This nigga gat no joy at all, he put me down naso I turn Americana.
Me: who the fu-ck are you!?
Body-builder: na me you dey ask *my heart jump* you go knack my wife!!
Me: what is this motherfucker yapping about?
Body-builder: na me you dey blow America for, no be you get this voter’s card?
Me: awwnn.. What the fu-ck! this ain’t me, d–n!!.. it must be my goddam! twin bro, hand it to me anyways, am gonna give the kiddo.
Body-builder: where your twin dey?
Me: I just told you am gonna send him his voter’s shit assho-le, that means he ain’t here.
Body-builder: oya collect *I take the voter’s card from him* deliver this message to am.
Me: what the fu-ck is that motherfu-cker?!
Naso I hear gboooooossssssaaaaaa!! I find myself floating in the air and I married the wall automatically, everywhere went blank. And I black out.
After some minutes I became subconscious again, I got up and look around me and saw the two bodyguards with Shantel and Ugochukwu, with some strange faces.
Me: what the fu-ck was that sound?
Ugochukwu: na the follow come madness with the slap?
My right cheek started peppering me immediately, I tried opening my mouth but pains shoot from my teeth and circulated all over my body.
Suddenly, my eyes became watery and tears started falling from my eyes.
Didn’t know when I started sobbing.
Ugochukwu: men don’t cry bro, America yo men. be a man.
Me: which man *sobbing* no repeat that thing oh! Man for that kind slap?
Ugochukwu: eyaaa! take heart.
Bodyguard1: sir, should we arrest him?
Me: arrest who?
Bodyguard2: the man that slapped you.
Me: why you no arrest the slap?
I left them there nursing my pains, I for don forget my room as Ugochukwu dey laugh me from behind.
I didn’t know I was holding my voter’ card till I saw Ishi sitting on the floor with his palms opened.
Me: Ishi, go baf make we commot here?
Ishi: I don baf finish na, I dey wait for ona *getting up*
The door opened laughing Ugochukwu stepped in with Shantel, with the two bodyguards.
Ugochukwu: yo men, yo men. Guy na America you been dey go but the mistake you make na to fly pass Nigeria,
Nigeria women no get joy to thief children. *laughing*
Shantel: you need ice?
Me: for?
Shantel: your slapped cheek.
Me: no remind me again, bro make we make move.
Ugochukwu: this mission dey dangerous, make Shantel no follow us.
Me: one of the bodyguard go carry her go house with the other car.
Ishi followed the two bodyguards and Shantel to get their things while Ugochukwu fell on the bed laughing hysterically.
Ugochukwu: na another person wife toto go kill you, I swear.
Me: *I smile* how you take know?
Ugochukwu: you be my gee na, the way the babe dey eye you, I know say her puna no go escape.
Me: that guy fit kill person because of that babe oh, the slap send me to where I go see my papa.
Ugochukwu: na the same slap the guy slap me when you run leave me na.
The door opened, Shantel stepped in with the bodyguards and Ishi, Ishi held his bags with the two bodyguards.
Me: wetin be your name?
Bodyguard1: Michael.
Me: carry her home with your car.
Ugochukwu: why you choose the one wey no get muscles?
Me: em small but mighty, em go do the job well.
Ugochukwu opened his arms and Shantel hugged him, I commot my eyes.
Ugochukwu: I go miss you sugar pum pum.
Shantel: me too.
Me: em don do, dey go.
I teared them away and Ugochukwu chuckled while Shantel giggled, she went with Michael while our four got ready to move.
I picked up my bag and gave to Ugochukwu, took the bag of money and we headed out of the guest house.
We came out and didn’t see the other car again, we went inside the car and drove out of the guest house.
We drove to the meeting hall and saw two soldiers parading the gate with guns, Madam Stella na action woman.
One of them walked to us and bent at the driver seat.
Soldier: who ona dey fine?
The other body-guard called his name or said something, all these their force code and we were granted access.
We entered the compound and saw soldiers everywhere, the type wey don go Sambisa forest come back. Them nodey smile at all.
I came down from the car and Ugochukwu did, with Ishi and the bodyguard.
Ugochukwu: who wan challenge?!
Me: nobody oh!
Ishi: wetin we dey do for here?
To Be Continued…. . . .
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