[STORY] SPOILT AT CHURCH (Episode 12)

SPOILT AT CHURCH by Bosede Fagbemi

Episode 12.

Life became unbearable for Martha to the extent that she felt like giving up. The attitude of people towards her- her parents inclusive, made it look as if she was the worst sinner in the world.

Her parents were unyielding, unloving and callous. With her father refusing to visit, her mother continually accused Martha of destabilizing her home and setting discord in an otherwise happy marriage. She became bitter to the point of resenting her.

To make matters worse, Mrs. Aboderin became a laughing stock to all and sundry. She returned home from Church at most times in tears because, one person or the other had made a reckless utterance, cast a stone at her or, reacted to her negatively. That was bad for her already fragile mental health and translated in different kinds of physical maladies. She became a recluse and continually transferred aggression on Martha. She only spoke to her in mono syllables.

Martha wanted companionship but no one was there to give to her. She wanted hope but her future looked bleak. Anytime she sat and ruminated on her predicament, she would remember her father’s exact words- You have used your hand to ruin your future. You will never amount to anything in life.

Furthermore, he said he was glad that she wasn’t the only child. He was optimistic that the other children would bring glory to the family name. She constantly remembered those words, until they became part and parcel of her and she started living them. Her talks, thoughts, dressing and demeanor depicted utter hopelessness.

Martha wanted someone to hold her and speak peace to her. She wanted a shoulder to lean on, and a balm to soothe her frayed nerves.

The symptoms of pregnancy did not make things easy. There were times she would throw up, to the extent of almost passing out and all her mother would say was- use avomine, take bitter cola. It got to a point that she felt her Mum was wishing her to die, and she in turn wished her fetus would die and free her. Free her to live a normal life, free her to move on, free her to re-awaken hope and free her to go back to the way she was; a vibrant, young and optimistic lady.

She wished to wake up from the long sleep that she had been subjected to. She wanted to be in the choir singing. She wanted to be in the congregation, not as a caricature in front of the Church, to listen to the Pastor teach about life. She wanted to stand in front of the children and take them on Bible lessons. But no one would allow her sing in the choir, or teach in the Sunday school. She could neither mingle with the unmarried ladies, nor be allowed in the midst of the married.

Martha had become a tainted woman, a scarlet lady that would live the rest of her life in regret, so her father said. Like Tamar, she would die in her father’s house as an old maid. He said she wouldn’t get a good man to marry her because, no sane man would marry someone with a bastard child.

She expected the Church to delegate someone to counsel her. The Pastor tried, but the person delegated was full of himself. He taught like the Pharisees of those days would do. So Martha stopped seeing him, and he was too glad to be relieved of the duty.

Martha tried turning to the Holy Spirit for help, after she had blamed God for abandoning her to her predicament and letting her enemies gloat over her, but her heart was closed to the gentle voice of the Spirit reassuring her that all will be well.

She developed resentment against God, her family, Jide, Kike, the Church and the whole world. She became extremely bitter, to the point that she stopped having her quiet time. And then, she began wishing for death. After the wish came the actualization. Solitude, a knife, to cut across the wrist.

She left a note for her parents.
To Be Continued… . . .

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