[STORY] IT’S NOT LOVE (Episode 02)

Bridget reminisced on how she had met Raphael and of course their wedding day

Bridget’s wedding day was the happiest day of her life. Her husband, Raphael, was handsome, smart, charismatic, and hardworking – everything a woman could ask for except for his insecurities and constant show of jealousy.

Bridget could remember that her girlfriends were envious of the fact that she was finally getting married to such an amazing guy, she couldn’t forget that they all wished for a husband like Raphael, and even Bridget’s parents, who are usually critical of people, thought that Raphael was perfect.

Their first year of marriage was problem-free. Raphael and Bridget worked a lot but still found time to start a family. Their first daughter was born in their second year of marriage but from that point, things just started going downhill.

Bridget never knew Raphael to be abusive or mean. If he had been anything other than good to her, she would never have married him. But after they had their first daughter, Bridget noticed a change in her husband. He gradually became abusive and constantly accused her of infidelity, each time she leaves the house.

Gone was the patient, understanding and compromising person; instead, Bridget found herself stuck with someone selfish, impatient, arrogant and rude.

Soon, Raphael was accusing her of being a lousy wife and mother. And he calmly demanded that she quits her job.

“I will set you up with a good business, if only you will listen to me and quit your job, if really you are faithful to me and you want me to trust you, then quit your job, we are not lacking anything, I’m wealthy, I Don’t know why you are working, when I can give you everything you want, every responsible wife depend on their husband for everything”Raphael had said loving

Bridget had to quit her job as her husband kept accusing her of sleeping with her boss and she got tired of explaining and proving her innocence. She became a full time house wife but still Raphael didn’t set her up with a good business as he had promised, instead he became more cruel and rude, he doesn’t appreciate anything she does and he will complain and nag at any given opportunity. If Bridget didn’t have dinner on the table by the time he got home from work, he would yell at her and be in a bad mood the rest of the night. If she forgets to pay a bill he would call her irresponsible and a liability. He picked on her cooking too, and forbade her to wear certain outfits.

Few months later after Bridget resigned from her job, Raphael began to make snide comments about her looks, and tried to stop her from spending time with her friends and family. Raphael finally killed Bridget’s self esteemed when he began to complain more about her look.

‘you’re getting fat, maybe you should do something about it’, and ‘your friends are stupid, I don’t know why

you hang out with them, your mother should know that you are married and you can’t be visiting all the time”. Raphael always said

Bridget still wonders how her sweet husband transformed into this cruel monster, but pretty soon Raphael’s verbal insults progressed to physical abuse.

On occasions where Bridget tries to defend herself or argue with Raphael, he would get so mad that he’d slap or kick her. The first time he hit Bridget, she was so shocked that she told herself that she must have imagined it. Subsequently, Bridget stopped arguing with him and would actually apologise when he gets provoked, but that doesn’t even help.

Soon, Raphael began to hit Bridget so hard that he left bruises on her body. And also he would slap her to the point where her cheek swelled up. Oddly, as much as Bridget knew that the abuse was wrong, she felt that she deserved it.

“I shouldn’t have defended myself” She would say

Bridget always told herself that the abuse was bearable.

‘At least he didn’t break my legs or beat me till I bled’, Bridget would say silently.

Raphael was also manipulative, that he had a way of manipulating poor Bridget, making her feel responsible for all the problems in their marriage. whenever he was done hitting her, he will return into Bridget’s arms with sweet apologises and promises and the next day he will buy her expensive gifts, gifts like the classic car, the latest iPhone, designer clothes and so many expensive gifts.

“You are my wife and I love you so much, you should always listen to me, obey me and we will not be having problems, I love you so much and we will be together forever” Raphael would always say and will seal the heart felt speech with a passionate kiss.

Bridget’s mum noticed a change in her personality and demeanour as she had stopped visiting like she used to but when she inquired from her daughter, Bridget denied that anything was wrong. To her she felt it was normal. She loved Raphael so much that she even went out of her way to protect him.

“My daughter you look so weird, you Don’t even wear make up anymore, you are losing so much weight, you Don’t even visit me anymore, are you okay?” Bridget’s mum had asked.

But Bridget didn’t open up, instead she told her mother that nothing was wrong.

How could she explain to her mother that her husband had banned her from stepping out of the house.

With time Bridget’s little daughter began noticing that Mum and Dad weren’t getting along, their little daughter of 4 years would ask Bridget why her father yelled at her all the time. Bridget response was ‘I was a bad Mummy and I made Daddy angry’.”

Bridget had continued to love her husband simply because she believes her husband loves her too and that’s why he was over possessive.

Raphael had made her believe that his insecurities and over possessiveness means love.

Raphael was only horrible to her behind closed doors. In the company of others, he was always kind, attentive and loving, and in those moments, it was hard for her to contemplate leaving him

If you see Bridget and Raphael together in public, you would never have guessed that they had problems. As they always wore matching outfits and Raphael was always singing her praise whenever they had company.

Bridget’s friends and family would even comment on her seemingly perfect marriage, saying, ‘Raphael and you are perfect together, he knows how to take care of you’.

Bridget would always greet such comments with a smile and agree. In the back of her mind, she tried to believe the very same thing about her husband. A part of her believed that he still loved her and that they could make their marriage work.

Whenever Bridget and Raphael fought, she never threatened to leave him. The way she saw it, she was going to stay married to him, no matter what. She told herself that every marriage had its ups and downs and she just had to accept the problems that came with it.

Bridget was also concerned about how Raphael and she would come across to others if they split up. To everyone else they were the perfect couple and she didn’t want to shatter that illusion.

Secretly, however, she was suffering and didn’t know how much more she could take. The torture continued that most night Bridget would cry herself to sleep and wondered how she ended up in such a bad situation. Raphael had completely eroded her self-esteem and confidence. She felt emotionally broken and defeated.

Her husband had made her believe that she couldn’t live without him, herself-worth and self-esteem are so low that she believe everything that Raphael says and she always adhere to his rules and regulations.

And worst she was so afraid of him!

But one-day something happened!

To Be Continued…. . . .