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Episode 34.

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I be wan answer her say I no be pastor when my phone started ringing, I checked the caller and it was Chisom, my heart skip.

Me: no vex, my pick this call. I dey kitchen.

Oniobong: all these small small chew gum girls don dey call you again.

I nofit hold the laugh I swear, I closed the door and started laughing as I head to the kitchen. My ringing tone was about to end when I swiped the screen and picked the call, w€tin Oniobong talk still dey replay for my head.

Chisom: why you dey laugh?

Me: no vex abeg.. Person tell me something wey make me laugh.

Chisom: you wicked oh, so you don collect w€tin you want na.. You no care about me again.

Me: baby, I don’t understand.

Chisom: since wey you fu-ck me, when last you call or chat me up?

Me: I dey sorry na, you know say I dey go work.

Chisom: you no try oh!

Me: sweetheart, the girl I go die for.. My one in a million.

Chisom: commot joor, Vic, I need your help.

Me: anything for my baby?

Chisom: you sure?

Me: ah ah! Anything for you, you no trust me again?

Chisom: I trust you, love of my life *I smile* na hospital I dey like this?

Me: w€tin you go do for hospital?

Chisom: my mama, them call me say she dey hospital.

Me: eyaaa! sorry oh, how she dey?

Chisom: she nodey fine *she start crying* you fit borrow me fifty thousand naira?

I went deaf immediately, fifty w€tin? Where I go see that kind money? na all these plenty questions I just dey ask myself oh.
Even though I wan scam my papa, em no go even gree release fifty thousand naira.

Me: Chisom, abeg end the call come online for whatsapp.

I switched on my data and I took a matches, and lit the burner then placed the pot I poured water into on the fire.
Chisom message pop-up on the notification bar.

Chisom: you no go help me?

Me: na em make I ask you to come online.

Chisom: I no get any other person, na only me my mama born. Please, Vic *all those people wey dey fvck you nkor?*

Me: I for help you oh, I nodey work for any company oh.. I never even finish school.

Chisom: what are you saying na?

Me: I no even get 50k for my savings account.

Chisom: tell me you are lying.

Me: am serious, all the company work something na just lie.

She viewed my message and didn’t reply fast like before, I dropped my phone first and continued cooking the indomie.
I put the noodles and spiced it up with crayfish and vegetable leaves with eggs, then finished cooking it.

I placed a frying pan on the fire after mixing egg with small salt and maggi, then with fresh paper. Poured inside the heated grand oil on the frying pan, my phone started vibrating non stop. I come dey wonder who love me like that na? To bomb me with so many messages.

After I was done putting the toasted egg on a breakable plate, I wiped my hands and picked my phone. I opened the message and all the vibration message notifications was from Chisom.

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I opened it and saw thousand curses, my phone started ringing and it was Chisom. I picked it.

Chisom: God go punish you for all the lies you dey take deceive girls.

Me: w€tin bring that one?

Chisom: idiot, useless boy.. Your prick no go ever stand again till you die.

Me: Chisom, why you dey insult me?

Chisom: if I no fvck you up for this Port-Harcourt wey we dey, change my name from Chisom.

I dey craze follow Chisom mad, I just dropped my phone on top the sink then carried the toasted egg and fried indomie for my two hands and took it to the room were Oniobong is.

She have started playing song and she was moving her big backyard, I must chop this thing I swear! She wore a red short body hugging gown, as she bend down pushed back her bumbum come shake to Timaya ukwu.

The plates nearly left my hands as my prick nod say this one na real ukwu wey dey shake gbuluu gbuluu.. I was standing there refusing to call her attention, I dey mad to try am.

She got up and turned.

Oniobong: you no even tell me say you don bring food. *she frown*

Me: you sabi twerk oh.. See the way I forget myself.

Oniobong: ashewo, why you no go forget yourself.

Me: leave that thing, even impotent prick go stand when em go see you dey twerk, abeg come eat oh.

I dropped the plates on the marbled floor and got her the soft drink I bought for her, she sat wiping away the beads of sweats forming on her forehead with back of her palm.

PHCN come bring light, I don dey plan how I go lock the windows for this kind heat but nothing pass fate. I quickly set the fan to blow her for the real upcoming match, I plugged my mp because I killed it last night ’cause I was playing music with it while I slept last night.

Oniobong: you no go join me.

Me: all na for you na, you know say you be my VIP visitor.

Oniobong: na you sabi oh!

I left the room with my towel, Oniobong was really enjoying herself sitting on the bed and eating from the breakable plate on the marbled floor.
I went inside the other bedroom and took my bath, borrowed my older brother Happy lovely perfume and wore only boxer.

No need of the trouser and shirt something wey I go still pull, I no get hairy chest hope she no go mind. I get only six packs, I waka go the kitchen to check if Chisom don mad finish.

I took my phone from the sink and tapped the screen and the light came alive three missed calls from Chisom and four new messages. I opened them and it was from Chisom, I deleted all of it and switched off my phone, no interruption biko.

I waka go the room were Oniobong is, I opened the door and saw her lying down watching Spartacus. I grinned, you dey fine Jesus film for my laptop you go fine tire.

I picked up the plates and the empty bottle, took to the sink and washed it clean then placed them neatly on the basket and then came back to the room to still see her watching the movie.

I laid beside her and watched quietly, the pirate or whoever he is, is digging one lady from behind.
I placed my leg on her, making sure my kneel touched her bumbum and then used my feet to message her chubby legs.


Oniobong isn’t tall, she is short with huge bu-ttocks and big bre-asts. She has a big face but she is fine, not that kind fine that can blow your mind. But the fine that can make your prick stand anyhow.

She didn’t say anything, I placed my right hand on her back then moved it slowly slowly down her right bum cheek.
When I reached there and grabbed it, she gasped and turned to look at me her face an itch away.

Oniobong: bad boy.

I grinned and leaned forward for a kiss, she didn’t move her face so I take that one as yes. I kissed her making sure I grabbed the helm of her gown and rolled it up as I devoured her lips.

I rested part of my weight on her side as she has turned and faced the dorm of the room, I wasn’t giving her any chance to break the kiss until I succeeded in getting her short gown to her waist.

I dipped my hand in her pa-nt and stimulated her cli-t, and then I thru-sted in two fingers inside her now we-t toto.
I broke the kiss and she gasped, beads of sweat forming on her forehead as she made a funny face. She bit her lip as I started moving my fingers down there.

Oniobong: aaahh! *she grab my arm* how many rounds you dey go?

Me: why you dey ask?

Oniobong: I no wan hear complain until we reach five rounds.

Ehnn…! aunty Calabar?!

To Be Continued….. . . .

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