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Episode 16.

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He left for Lagos without settling our differences. He spent four days in Lagos without calling or texting. He left me worried and lonely.

The one week marital bliss he introduced me to before he left was my undoing. Every night I feel h—y but my man is far away in Lagos. He made me taste the sweetness of marriage and sex and took it away from me unceremoniously. This act made me feel really bad and quite uncomfortable . Negative thoughts had suddenly taken over me, series of strange emotions and burning desires had become my acquaintance. I discussed my predicament with Sarah and she gave me an advice that left me dumbfounded…. “Jesus save me”… She advised me to get a guy that would make it up for me while my husband is away. God forbid, ”I roared angrily at Sarah. I am a good Christian and will never do anything of such. I was mad at Sarah for proffering such an unholy advice. For three days I cut off from her and avoided her. Life was really difficult for me for those three days of seclusion.Nobody to talk to or share my worries with. I found myself wallowing in utter emptiness and delusion. My husband had abandoned me, my only friend and confidant wants me to commit adultery. My desire and passion for intimacy with the opposite sex is burning me up fast. I had no option than return back to my friend, she’s the only one who understands me too well. I may not yield to her advice on adultery but we could find a way around it, if she could give me another advice different from adultery.

After close of work I waylaid Sarah at the car park, ‘‘I am sorry for avoiding you all these days. ’ I apologized to her. She smiled and hugged me. ‘Folake, I have nothing against you, I was only trying to help you. You’ re reserved the right to either take or reject the advice but not to jettison me out of your life. Okay, I am sorry, “i quickly apologised with stern keenness to accept my friend back j to my turbulent life”.I am passing the night in your house tonight.’ I said to her. ‘Of course I am a free woman now that my husband is not in town. We picked a taxi and headed to Sarah’s house.’‘What will you like to eat Folake? “Sarah queried, ‘I want to eat shawamar.’ I replied. ‘You are not serious – if you want to eat shawamar you better call your husband in Lagos to buy you shawarma ,” she sarcastically replied. She quickly undressed and moved into the kitchen to prepare dinner for us. While she was cooking we kept gisting. We spoke about everything and laughed over it. Indeed, i’m fond of Sarah. Folake, have you watched “My Love, My Life?”, she seemed to have remembered as she grabbed a plate to dish out the delicious spaghetti she cookedi. It’s the latest love movie in town,”she tried convincing me. I’m not the movie type and definitely not a worldly movie as this would be be. I could tell from the name. However, i accepted the offer, do i even have a choice? She searched her CD rack for the movie . She slotted it for me and I began to watch reluctantly. It was a nice film but the kissing and caressing in the film triggered untamed lust within me. I watched the movie till late in the night because the storyline is just intriguing. I went to bed with terrible lust that night.

In my dream, I had sex with four different men before daybreak. This has never happen to me before. I knew this was a bad sign so I started fasting the following morning. I made up my mind never to watch such type of movie again but the fasting could not erase the memories of those romantic scenes I watched from that movie. What have I done to myself? O God help me, I prayed. When I got home that day I felt like grabbing any man I saw around. It was as if i was on my heat period. If a male visitor had come knocking at my door that moment, I would have fallen for him. At night I couldn’t sleep because of lust. I fondled my breasts for some minutes alone in the room. The sensation gave me a temporal relief but that was not enough for me. As I checked the time it was past 1am. The night was still young and yet, I couldn’t sleep.

I left the bedroom and went to sitting room but I felt no better. I went to the kitchen to take a glass of water but that didn’t make me feel better either. Then I went back to the bedroom and helped myself to c-m. I just committed masturbation which I have preached against for years. After the act I felt very empty and light. I knew something had left me. I needed nobody to tell me I had sinned against my body and the indwelling Holy Spirit . I wept bitterly and asked God for forgiveness for the remaining part of the night. Because of guilt I couldn’t go to our church on Sunday.

I attended Sarah’s church just to keep myself away from my church. They had corporate and civilized people in their church. Men and women who aren’t couples greeted each other with hugs without anyone seeing anything wrong with that. Even the pastor hugged several ladies right in the presence of his wife. ‘’Folake, “come and say hi to my friends” ’, Sarah beckoned on me. I moved closer as she stood before three handsome guys. ‘”This is Martins, she introduced with a big grin,” Martins meet Folake’.”she turned to Martins. He stretched out his hand for a shake and I gave him mine. She pointed to the second guy, ‘this is Mike, Mike meet my friend Folake’, the same process as the first. The third guy was the cutest among them. His haircut was charming, his eyes were welcoming, I admired him before he was introduced. ‘Here is Tony, Tony meet my friend.’ Before Sarah finished her introduction, he opened his arms for a hug and unconsciously, I found myself in his arms.

The sensation was nice and the aroma of his body spray was seductive. He held me for almost fifteen seconds before I realized I was in strange arms, I disengaged politely but a seed was already sown. I quickly walked away to wait for Sarah at the the gate. Standing at the gate, i couldn’t seem to take my mind off the young man i just met… …… What could be possibly happening to me?

To Be Continued…. . .

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